By Alex Ogundadegbe
Researchers placed four monkeys in a room. At the centre of the room was a tall pole with a bunch of ripe inviting bananas hanging from the top. Soon getting hungry, one of the monkeys scaled to pole trying to reach the bananas. A shower was just atop the bananas so each time a monkey reached for the bunch he was showered with a jet of ice cold water. Each of the monkeys tried to reach the bananas and one after the other they were doused with the cold water and they slid down in frustration. After several attempts all the monkeys gave up.
ALSO READ:5th National Games, Ilorin 2019
At intervals the researchers removed one of the monkeys from the room and replaced him with a “fresh monkey”. As soon as the new comer sought to climb the pole to access the bananas the other three pulled him down in discouragement. The researchers removed the ‘old monkeys ‘ one by one and each time a new monkey tried to scramble up the pole, the others pulled him down. At a point, all the monkeys in the room were new. None of them would climb the pole and none of them had experienced the ice cold douse of water that the first four felt. At the final assessment none of the four new monkeys had climbed the pole and none of them seemed to know why!
The moral of this true story: watch whom you associate with, they influence your capacity for ambition and achievement for good or bad. Never get caught in the company of people who will keep telling you concerning your goal: “It can’t be done!” “That’s impossible!” Surround yourself with cheerleaders rather than discouragers. The Holy Book says: “Bad association spoils useful habits” and it’s true.
One of the greatest influences to your success is your peer group. As the saying goes, “Show me who your friends are and I’ll show you who you are!” The Chinese refer to harmonious business relations as Guan xi! They will tell you: “No Guan Xi no business! What they are talking about is the people you relate with on the business front and how you relate with them. Your ability to form and forge proper rewarding relationships with the right people will determine how successful you are and what you achieve in life. One approach to having right people in your business life is making a conscious effort to relate with such people. Seek them out and spend time with them. We need to have a great support team for whatever goals we have put up for ourselves in life. Think about it, championship athletes: boxers, race car drivers and sprinters normally work with a group of people who advise them on how to get better at what they do. So why don’t you? Richard Carswell China based success coach who is mentoring hundreds of modern day managers agrees with this when he says: “surround yourself with a great support team of great teachers, friends and mentors in order to facilitate the achievement of your goals.
David McClenton of Harvard University studied peer groups and achievement for 30 years and came to the conclusion that “If you have chosen to be successful you have to make sure that there are successful people around you who can influence your actions and your state of mind”.
George Washington a former president of the United States advised that “It’s better to be alone than be in bad company”. Suppose you just do not have access to the people you wish to associate with? Or assuming you live in a neighborhood where the negative influences are more than the positive, what’s to be done? Use your mind!
Form a master mind group. Try as often as possible to move out and get around people who are progressing in life. You may have to leave your comfort zone to do this and make an extra effort to read books written about or by the people you have in mind, watch documentaries and attend conferences where you can meet them.
On the average ninety nine percent of the people you meet on a daily basis are not going anywhere with their lives. You have to be careful and make sure such groups of people do not have an influence on you. You must engage in long range and short range plans to achieve your goals and frequently check on yourself and make sure that you are progressing. Why do I emphasize association as a stimulus to progress? There is a phenomenon known as the chameleon factor. Human beings take on the behavior of the people they associate with. We would be influenced to talk like, dress like and even think like the people we allow into our lives. Avoid negative people if you can. If you can’t avoid them, discountenance their advice and find a way to reduce the influence they have on your life. You’ll be glad you did.
